The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.