Texts From Last Night

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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick

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  (304): My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick http://tfl.nu/tgso
  Replies (27) Good night (3833) Bad night (710)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness

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  (303): i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness http://tfl.nu/nepk
  Replies (34) Good night (7772) Bad night (646)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.

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  (231): i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister. http://tfl.nu/u6ro
  Replies (20) Good night (1125) Bad night (4834)
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  (650): View more from California

  She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine

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  (650): She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine http://tfl.nu/h16d
  Replies (15) Good night (3580) Bad night (1556)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.

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  (740): Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed. http://tfl.nu/6s1t
  Replies (5) Good night (2509) Bad night (1075)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age

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  (812): The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age http://tfl.nu/fek2
  Replies (10) Good night (3649) Bad night (845)
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  (914): View more from New York

  It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional

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  (914): It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional http://tfl.nu/y54e
  Replies (2) Good night (698) Bad night (2173)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.

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  (804): and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start. http://tfl.nu/94bc
  Replies (6) Good night (1311) Bad night (714)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard

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  (610): I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard http://tfl.nu/mt5d
  Replies (3) Good night (1375) Bad night (458)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.

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  (701): Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open. http://tfl.nu/k8hm
  Replies (9) Good night (2263) Bad night (453)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.

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  (740): New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug. http://tfl.nu/1fsb
  Replies (3) Good night (759) Bad night (295)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important

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  (+44): have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important http://tfl.nu/fujo
  Replies (2) Good night (790) Bad night (371)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.

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  (312): Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco. http://tfl.nu/zgwl
  Replies (4) Good night (784) Bad night (513)
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  (310): View more from California

  I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip

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  (310): I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip http://tfl.nu/scxm
  Replies (1) Good night (600) Bad night (406)
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  (310): View more from California

  Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised

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  (310): Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised http://tfl.nu/dc6t
  Replies (1) Good night (567) Bad night (410)

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