i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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