just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
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The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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