just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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