I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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