so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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