Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
