dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
