bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
