Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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