i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
