Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
My feet surprised me
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
