planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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