he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
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