I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I have so many feelings about this burrito
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
