if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
