with your own penis?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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