Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
