Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
