You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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