Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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