I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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