Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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