FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
this just has baby written all over it
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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