whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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