Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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