He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
