I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?