You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
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I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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