I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Randomize
