I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize