White coat. Heels.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize