Your mouth is God's brothel.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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