creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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