I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
