I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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