Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
