so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
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I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
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Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
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