oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
he thought i was a dude.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
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I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
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We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.