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• (312): View more from Illinois

  if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself

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• (801): View more from Utah

  I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (516): View more from New York

  Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down

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• (940): View more from Texas

  P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.

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• (315): View more from New York

  Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas

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