i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
