can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
