high people should be assigned attendants
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize