I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
4 words: hood of his car
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
i think my cat just said my name.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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