I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Randomize
