Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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