Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had hair everywhere except his balls
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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