Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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