i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
