just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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