More tranny stories later!
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
