dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
